Bob: Say, buddy, can you spare a dime?
Buddy: Get a friggin’ job!
Bob: Sheesh! Say, pal, can you spare a dime?
Ray: Wha? Oh, sure . . . Lemme see if I got one . . .
Bob: You’re really helping me out.
Ray: Shika-shika . . . Ach, no dimes. Here, just take this quarter . . .
Bob: I only need a dime, actually . . .
Ray: Well, I admire your candor, but considering the straits you’re in, I’d think . . . (Glances at Bob) . . . I’d . . . Bob? Bob Meager?
Bob: Ray! Ray Plenty! Long time no see!
Ray: Hell, Bob, you don’t look like you need a dime.
Bob: It’s this damn portable GPS – I’ve got to change the batteries, but I left my Swiss Army at the hotel.
Ray: Today’s your lucky day, Bob – I just picked up the new Victoria Lite Ruby! Hold on a sec . . . (Rustle, rustle) . . . in here somewhere . . .
Bob: Oh-ho-ho . . . you misunderstand. I left my platoon from the Swiss Army back at the hotel.
Ray: Wha?
Bob: Yeah . . . they come in handy when I have to exfiltrate one of my customers.
Ray: What, are you in security or something? Ha ha ha. (Nudge, nudge) Remember when you used to dress up like a ninja during Hell Week?
Bob: Actually, I’m in tourism.
Ray: “Actually, I’m in tourism.” Ha ha ha! But seriously, it’s a dangerous world out there, you know?
Bob: Uh . . .
Ray: Making a buck off the war on terror? Hey – good for you. Better you than a schmuck I don’t know. Good for you.
Bob: No, no, no . . . I’m really in tourism. In fact, I lost it all during the SARS crisis, but now I’m on a roll.
Ray: Jeeze, you alright? You makin’ it okay?
Bob: Well, I’ve got my own platoon . . .
Ray: You’re not a drug lord, are you?
Bob: C’mon, Ray. Look – have you ever seen those clear plastic balls that hamsters roll around in?
Ray: Yeah.
Bob: I’ve scaled them to human size, installed the latest hi-tech security devices, bucket seats, and strapped on a Rolls-Royce engine. I sell them to tour companies. The two millionth rolls out this month.
Ray: What sort of tour companies?
Bob: Japanese tour companies.
Ray: You mean to tell me there are thousands of Japanese roaming the world in their own personal plastic bubbles?
Bob: Yeah.
Ray: (Mulls this over for a moment) Haa-ha-ha! You had me goin’ there, man! C’mon, what’re you up to?
Bob: Really . . . it’s no joke . . . I’m serious . . . Really . . .